Everyone’s talking about the Wall Street Journal article about famous mommy blogger Dooce.
What a journey she’s had. Yowza! As a “D” list blogger, I can relate (distantly) to some of her travails.
Like Dooce, I attract my share of haters–both here and, occasionally, at the Mountain X Web site where my weekly column runs. I do moderate comments here (mostly to deal with spam) and I’ve learned just to hit delete when I sense irrational hate. Which doesn’t mean I don’t encourage healthy debate. Disagree with me, correct me, tell me what you think. But do it nicely, please.
Unlike Dooce, I don’t get enough hate mail that I feel the need to print it all out, lay it out in the driveway and run over it. Thank God.
Like Dooce, I make ad revenue–it’s basically beer money, not in the guesstimated range of $40,000 per month that Dooce pulls. I haven’t chased up ads energetically, not that I could possibly ever be in her league. Who is? In fact, I’ve just realized that my Google adsense hasn’t been updated since I moved the bloggie to Wordpress (gotta check on that).
Like Dooce, I’ve managed to inadvertently offend a few family members with my writing. I’m typically much tamer than she is (one reason I’m still D-list). Unlike Dooce, no one in my family has stopped talking to me, although a few of them have stopped reading this blog. I’ve offended other people as well, some of whom have read stuff into my work that I never intended.
Like Dooce, I have blogging boundaries, though quite a few more than she has. I don’t put names of family or friends out there, unless I have permission, or I’m talking about other bloggers or celebrities, who’ve put themselves out there already. I don’t name my kids. While I do write a lot about my children, there are a number of personal issues and relationships that are just none of my readers’ beeswax.
Basically, I’m happy being a “D” list blogger and doing it my way. But I’m glad there are bloggers like Dooce putting it out there, warts and all. You go, girl.
i’ve checked dooce for a couple years…and i feel really badly for her daughter. she did not ask to have her tantrums and increasing neuroses laid out to the millions of people who click on that site. what about her privacy? how will she feel about it when she’s 13? i believe dooce is unfairly exploiting her child. i think you do a great job of balancing this problem, edgy mama.
Thanks, skippy.
I question and doubt myself and my writing a lot.
Steve Almond, who is mentioned in the WSJ article, and who is one of my favorite writers in the world, stopped blogging recently for just this reason–plus the haters.
I think there has to be a balance between discussing parenting and our kids in a helpful and humorous way and exploiting them. It’s hard, for sure.
i’ve been checking your site for a couple years also and i have no idea your childrens’ names, and i think that’s great. it’s the tone of her posts, too, they are sometimes negative or bitter, while yours are positive and informative. i’m not comfortable knowing her daughter has her name taped to the fridge at nursery school for being a head case. i just think it’s sad. and your posts are not sad. they’re realistic & honest & detailed without the negativity.
http://www.dooce.com/2008/03/18/breaks-out-rash-if-fed-anything
my two cents…keep it up!
I actually only check in on Dooce every few months, so I guess I missed some of the drama! Yowza!
Skippy,
I went back and read your link and all it says is that the kid is a “very picky eater.” Not sure that makes her a head case. I’ve written about my kids’ being picky eaters too! Though I do try to be positive.
Thanks again!
Skippy, Leta definitely provides “material” for Dooce, but I don’t see how she’s being exploited. Dooce writes about her with honesty and humor and intense love. I also don’t see all the bitterness and negativity you’re referring to. If I were Leta reading through the posts, I think the embarrassment wouldn’t be any greater than the embarrassment I actually felt at 13 when my mother came to pick me up from school every day in the same grungy sweatshirt and sweatpants.
stupidmommy, if your mom’s sweatshirt said “MY DAUGHTER IS OBSESSIVE and COMPULSIVE and HOARDS WRAPPERS!” i would say that is close to what dooce is doing. she blogs about these things to get more readers to get more hits to get more advertising cash, i think that’s exploiting the innocent. if she were writing about her OWN obsessions and compulsions ONLY that would be fine. i just think some of the things she posts about her family are, as EM says, none of our beeswax. if she makes it through adolescence, i hope leta starts a blog to tell her story.
I think maybe you’re reading it a bit too literally. Kids sometimes hoard things, for example, and act OCD-ish, and she’s writing about that with humor. She’s not literally saying, “My daughter has a mental illness.” Besides, how in the world do you know she’s writing about that stuff “to get more readers to get more hits to get more advertising cash”?
i’m trying to put this in perspective and the standard in family law is what’s happening “in the best interest of the child” and when i apply that to a mother posting stories knowingly broadcast to millions of people worldwide of her child’s irritability and quirks to put it mildly - (i.e. the story of when she went to the beach and could not have a grain of sand on her?) - i don’t see how it measures up. i think dooce is a fantastic writer, and i am very entertained by a lot of her writng, i just dont agree with her choices to highlight the negative character traits and behaviors of her loved ones on the internet. for instance the photo she posted today of flowers, saying leta changes her mind weekly about her favorite color. that is cute. then she says she gets her indecisiveness from her father. that is not cute. that is talking smack about your husband on the internet. indecisiveness is a negative character trait any way you look at it, and to label your husband such is unkind, whether it’s honest or not. there doesn’t seem to be much respect. i think if the goal here is to raise kids who are well-adjusted and adaptable and able to deal with the crap life flings and thrive despite that, dooce pointing out many ways that leta is rigid and irrational and in her own words obsessive and compulsive is not in the best interest of the child. i would say every post she writes is to get more readers, her site supports the whole family.
Who is this dooce person?
Who, indeed, G!
Hiya! I must’ve gotten linked somewhere because bloggers I haven’t heard from in years are suddenly coming out of the woodwork! Great to see y’all.
dooce is the embodiment of X’er sensibility. I think she generates bipolar responses in people because she’s extremely profane and revealing but also gets to play the victim (suicidal, depressive, white mom in general). It’s quite a combination. I have to confess, during the miscarriage episode a few months ago I was a bit relieved that it happened, since she has focused a great deal on how shitty her pregnancy and many things since then have been. Since her original notoriety stemmed from talking shit about people I suppose it should continue to be her gimmick. Truly fascinating.