Some of my loyal readers and friends have been complaining that Edgy Mama has lost her edge. Even non-friends have mentioned the same. The short-lived but lively local blog “Not Thomas Wolfe” called me “mundane Mama.” After I got over the initial five minutes of hurt, I found the moniker pretty funny. He/she was right, dammit!
Lately, I’ve been writing too much about my puppy, my kids, and my “other” writing. I haven’t thrown out much about sex, mid-life anxiety, controversial issues, or even books I’ve read. I’ve become mundane, mellow, and middle-aged.
Let’s examine this development. When I started blogging almost three years ago, I was hungry to revive the writing career that had slowed to a trickle during six years of birthing and caring for babies. I was feeling feisty, unfulfilled, and flirty.
What’s changed since then? Well, my freelance career has blossomed. I have a weekly biz profile gig for one newspaper. I’ve written a number of feature, entertainment, and health articles for that newspaper as well. I’ve written an article for a book that will be published in November. I’ve taken up photography, seriously, again and had photos published and been paid to photograph events (not weddings - don’t even ask). Recently, I started a dream gig - a weekly column about parenting from the pov of EM’s newly mundane, but still occasionally witty and snappy, voice (actually, I’m only contracted for two more weeks, but I think they’ll want me to continue - please, please).
In non-career news, my kidlings are older and more self-sufficient. I have more free time, more me time. I have a life outside the home. I’ve let go of my previous high standards for home cleanliness and organization. I realize that no one really cares when I don’t make up the beds or I let the kids live out of their (clean) laundry baskets for a few days.
Through my work and this bloggie, I’ve met and become friends with lots of bloggers, writers, photographers, and other creative folks in this quirky town. I’ve interacted with people from all nooks and crannies of life, from a pet psychic to a wealth management consultant to a covey of computer geeks.
There have been bumps along the road, but in truth, I tend to forgot about those pretty quickly. I haven’t written or tried to publish much fiction recently. An attempt to run a flash fiction site failed from lack of time, marketing, and good submissions. I’m about to add onto my home, which scares the bejezus out of me. But, otherwise, life’s cool.
Damn, I have lost some of the edge. It may come back. I could get hungry and feisty again. The crazy anony who, for the most part, have stopped spewing nastiness on the bloggie, could come back and get me riled up. Or I could just ignore them, delete their bad karmic comments, and keep my blood pressure stable.
So, what do y’all think? Am I losing the edge? And other than creating some kind of upheaval in my cool-ass life, how can I get it back?
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I think we’re in the midst of a national, possible global, downturn of Edge.
I feel the same way, and my impending fatherhood makes me wonder if my blog won’t become just another dad’s tribute to the most awesome kid in the world (mine, of course).
Your Edge will return. We go through hills and valleys, deserts and mountains of life. Depending on your current situation will dictate whether you are in an ebb or a flow.
Annette Pieper
http://www.annettepieper.com
Don’t be hard on yourself. Write what you feel like. I’ll be here, nonetheless.
Actually, I love the blogs about your Bisc and your kids and your Espouse and your life at the pnav and your photos and and and and YOU
I live a more settled life vicariously through you…
Adding on to your home?! That will certainly make you edgy - but perhaps not in the way you’d like…
It may just be a testament to my very dull life, but I’ve always thought you were one of the edgiest and most interesting of my friends
You are too damn busy to be Edgy - on paper anyway. You still got it goin’ on sister.
I still ready you daily . . .
Even as cute (ca-yoote) as Bisc is, I already know way too much about him. So in the spirit of blunting the edge I suggest the following new names for your bloggie:
Serene Mama
Unperturbed Mama
The Placid Redhead
Self-Possessed in Asheville
Whaddya think? I’m onto something here something right?
Seriously EM, I blame the heat and forecast a reemergence of edge just in time for the turning of the seasons.
Thanks, all.
Winter, you’re mistaking me for my sis. I’m the blonde one!
EM:
Enjoy the pacific moments while you have them.
And what’s this about anony “bad karmic comments”? Trashing the good non-name, those imposters.
-JA
The edge is there. I read you when I can, often 3 at a time. You always make me laugh, and I get what you’re saying. You are very clear. I appreciate that in these times of obfuscation (aka politics). I love the parent column.
I definitely lost my edge in the past few years–a return to school is sharpening it.
I think it’s all part of a natural cycle - and then, I think a big part of it is the blog anonymity/fame conflict. You & I have talked about this before (and it’s what I wanted the MountainX article to address more directly, but they went political) but the thing is, when you know that your mother, and, even worse, your mother’s friends, might be reading your blog, it gets harder and harder to say “Hey, I fucked the poolboy yesterday under the influence of one too many Clonopin.” (that’s my blog, not yours, of course
) and it’s just a lot easier and less worrisome to talk about the dog. Not to mention that poolboy days are few and far between, alas, but the dog is always there.
Seriously, though, I know losing my anonymity has led me to a lot of self censorship. Even my kids censor me - my son flips out if he’s ever mentioned in my blog, my daughter gets upset when she’s not. And they don’t read it, but they run into people who do and it skeeves them both out in their different ways. So.
Long winded comment, sorry, but this is something I battle with as well. And I’m not sure what the answer is, but I think we’ve both sort of come to a workable compromise. Which, as is so often the case, may be the best answer there is