On Christmas Day, I was the lucky recipient of many lovely giftees from various family members and friends. Thank you all!
Thanks, in particular, for the chocolate. I received an amazing supply of dark chocolate from both of my sisters, E-spouse, one brother-in-law, Santa, and my kids. I, thus, conclude, that one of the following must be true: 1. I need to gain weight; 2. these folks know I love chocolate and have no idea what else to give me; 3. I’ve been particularly irritable recently and we all know that chocolate equals Prozac.
I also received a couple unusual giftees. I can’t decide which is the most unusual, so I’m going to let you decide.
First is this handmade bag that my MIL gave me:
Yes, that’s a photograph of lizards having, uh, sexual relations, on the bag. My MIL said she thought it was edgy. And it is. But what, exactly, does it mean when your MIL gives you a bag featuring geckos getting grungy?
Unusual giftee number two from my sister, A:
No, we have not recently discovered that we are descended from ancient Chinese royalty. Those flip flops are called Shape-up Shoes. Among other things, these magic shoes can tone your legs, burn extra calories (from eating all that chocolate), put junk in yo trunk, and, most likely, land you in the hospital with a broken ankle where Dr. Dreamy will sweep you away (of course, he’ll have to carry you).
Here’s a close-up view:
I tottered around the house on these babies for about 1/2 an hour today, and I do admit, my calf muscles got a nice stretch. But now my lower back is killing me.
So, which giftee wins the most unusual prize? And can you top it?
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I vote for the shoes, those things look lethal! The bag I would probably carry once in a while just to see if anyone noticed the lovin’ lizards but the shoes…..no way
Love both the shoes and the bag.
OMG Edgy - your family is even more random than mine! UNREAL! My vote is for the Randy Reptiles… way too funny. I showed it to all of my friends here in Savannah & their vote is with the Sex Sack too. We do, however, want to know where to get the shoes - a good way to prep the legs for swimsuit season! You can never be too prepared, right?
My dumb gifts of LAST year (I didn’t see the Parental Units this year)… Dad gave me a bag of Hershey Kisses, a kitty cat calendar, some Cherry Blossom lotion from B&BW, & a Maneheim Steamroller CD. Um??? Hi, I’m an ADULT & I have taste. Thanks for the re-gifting! ALSO, my mother intercepted the $1k gift Grandma gave me so that Mom could pay off some phantom childhood dead. I have NEVER gotten this kind of $ for Crimmus - nor will I ever if Mom has anything to do with it! I didn’t even know about the gift til one of my cousins asked me what I did with my $1k from Grams. I was like - WHAT $1k from Grams?? No shit.
Good times in the Land of Listless.
I hope you & the kiddos & kitties & E-Spouse are having loads of phun!
I gave the Peach State a big hug for you today
love,
The ALaina Lynne
PS - you look not a day over 21 in that photo. My friend was like - she has kids???? I thought she was in college… damn, I was gonna ask you for her number.
The shoes look like death traps but I am very impressed with the perfectly pedicured tootsies, in the middle of winter.
(Found you on “the google,” I’m scoping Asheville blogs as we consider a school there for my child).
The tootsies aren’t typically so peded this time of year–only because I spent three days at the beach two weeks ago!
Thanks, Peach. I was in Georgaw last Friday night! 21, right!!!
Those are odd, and no, I can’t top it, but I did send something! I ACTUALLY MAILED something to you. That in itself is a Christmas Miracle.
The postal people said you should get it tomorrow.
Leapin’ lizards, Batman, it’s got to be the scrumpin’ sack.
W. Gladstone1, 2
(1) Centre for Environmental and Urban Studies and School of Biological Sciences, Macquarie University, 2109 North Ryde, New South Wales, Australia
(2) Present address: School of Biological Sciences F07, University of Sydney, 2006 Sydney, New South Wales, Australia
Accepted: 22 June 1987
Communicated by G. F. Humphrey, Sydney
Abstract Sharpnose puffers, Canthigaster valentini (Pisces: Tetraodontidae) at Lizard Island, Australia, live in made-dominated haremic social and mating systems. The hypothesis was that mature females are restricted in their movements and can be monopolized by some males. Field experiments at Lizard Island, Great Barrier Reef, between January and March 1983 showed that mature females were still territorial in the absence of males and movements of females were not controlled by males. Males abandoned their territories when their females were removed. The territorial behavior of those males with access to females (territorial males) restricted the access of other males (bachelor males) to them. Bachelor males took over harems and became territorial males when established territorial males were removed. The results of the experiments thus supported the hypothesis.
This is my final answer. AD
I’m voting for the legs’n'ass shoes. While torturous, I think they’re ingenious.
They’re also, however, impossible for a man to gift to anyone without being pegged as a lout.
You’re right, Screwy, only women can give Shape-Up Shoes!
Ash’s Dad, thank for the lizard mating habits information. What would I do without you?
Eddo,
You are greatest! Though you’ll have to send another of those voice amplication thingees, cause my kids are fighting over it! Thank you, thank you for the most unusual and fun care package ever!
That bag is unusual to the point of weird, but certainly good fun and a bit of a conversation starter.
My most unusual present this year was a wand carved with a vine design, basically a replica of Hermione Granger’s wand in the Harry Potter movies. I can see a HP marathon with the 12-year-old giver in my future.