We haven’t heard from my loverly cousins Libs and Wozie in many months.
Not sure how much she wants me to share, but Wozie has had a tough year. You know she is tougher than her year has been, though.
I’ll see both crazy chicks this Friday and Saturday at the extendo Family Christmas Par-tay in Hotlanta, followed by our annual cuz lunch.
I did exchange e-mails with Libs the other day and thought I’d share, because, well, she’s so damn cute. And she loves to paint me as a total hippie freak. And, surprisingly, it seems that my mind is dirtier than hers!
Some idiot, who should be castrated with a corkscrew, broke into Libs’ house and STOLE her computer, so she’s been trying to find addresses, e-mail and otherwise.
So she e-mails me: “Well, you see, had I been able to pull up your blog I would have known that you were out of town, but not knowing the address, well….there’s the rub. Using the pea size brain I was born with, I decided to try www.edgymama.com - and it worked! Am I a rocket scientist or what? - do NOT answer that question!
In any case, just wanted you to know that had I not known better I’d have sworn I was behind your car in traffic today. Amidst the lovely collection of bumper stickers were: “MY OTHER CAR IS A BROOM”, “WOULD JESUS HAVE VOTED FOR WAR?” and last, but not least, “SAVE THE EARTH - EAT YOUR SPROUTS”. I do not even pretend to understand that last one - in fact, I’d be embarrassed if I did. All this to say - looking forward to seeing you over Christmas!
Your favorite and loving cousin,
Libs”
I replied: “hey libs,
sorry your puter got lifted. that sucks.
seems that you found my e-mail address. I have a couple. you so smart!
EAT YOUR SPROUTS is totally innocent, you dirty-minded girl.
can’t wait to see you next weekend.
xoxoxo,
af”
She said: “now I’m trying to think of something dirty it could mean!”
BTW, I only have two bumper stickers on the Baby Beluga (Honda Civic Hybrid). One reads: “Asheville: Where Normal is Weird” and the other says “Vote Heath Shuler.” Bit of a conflict there, I know, but such is me.
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My bumper stickers are “God bless the people of every nation,” “Isle of Iona,” and “I’d rather be skateboarding.”
back in my college days, we used to say that someone smelled “like a hot sprout sammich” if we knew they just had intimate relations with another person, be they a Libs-like Junior Leaguer or an Edgy Mama freaknik.
Damn Ash, that’s creative. But along the lines of what I was thinking.
Great minds, right?
Your cousins sound like fun. Have a great par-tay and lunch!
I do love the libs and woze stories. I’d like to meet them someday.
I have no bumperstickers at the moment. Can’t seem to find one that I’m willing to share with the world. But I love reading the stickers of others. Happy Holidays E.M.
EM, Have a great time with family and remind them we love to hear from and about them. Cheers, AD
Libs, Sorry to hear your puter got snatched. I think your cuz is pretty techno savvy so I’m sending her a video clip you might want to study for the next bad boy that tries to take something of yours. Happy Holidays!