One of the mixed benefits of this bloggie is the occasional freebie thrown my direction. I’ve gotten to go to a movie premiere for free; I’ve gotten to act in a local film; people have sent me random gifts (although no chocolate or beer); and I’ve received advance copies of several books.
I love books. But I don’t love ALL books. If someone sends me a freebie, though, I often feel obligated to write about the book, whether I like it or not. As a journalist, I’ve wrestled with the ethics of freebies, and had several discussions with my editor about when and what is okay to accept. With the bloggie, the ethical lines are a bit more blurred. So I’ve decided if I’m going to write about a freebie book, I’ll just tell you guys ahead of time, and you can decide whether or not you want to read my blather about it.
This is all to say that I just finished skimming a hilarious and sad free book, sent to me by a smart publicist. Yes, I said hilarious and sad, which you’ll understand soon.
The book is titled “The Kindergarten Wars: The Battle to Get into America’s Best Private Schools.” It’s written by a former independent schools board member (though he refuses to say which school) named Alan Eisenstock. The cover has a little box that reads: “Inside the $500,000 decision…”
Wow. Yes, that’s half a million dollars to send your child to, I assume, 12 years of private school. I know price differs from school to school, but still. That’s a wad o cash.
Anyway, I had a difficult time reading parts of this book, because I’m tied in close to the independent school community. While my kids don’t go to private school, I did, from 4th to 12th grades. I then worked for three different independent schools after graduating college. I’ve consulted for other private schools since then. My dad is on the boards of two private schools (the one he attended, and the one me and my sisters attended). Most of my father-in-law’s career was in private schools. My youngest sister’s child just started Kindergarten at the school she and I attended.
That said, I strongly believe in public education. One reason I live in Asheville is because the public education opportunities are excellent here. One of government’s primary tasks should be to educate its citizen’s children to the highest standards. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen. Public education, as far as I can tell, fluctuates wildly across this country in terms of strength and efficacy. Of course, private education isn’t consistent either. So much depends on the quality of the teaching and administration. So, you could pay 1/2 a mill and still NOT get the education you may dream of for your chillens.
The hilarious and sad part of The Kindergarten Wars is how crazy these parents can be. Some of them will sell their very souls to get their child in the “right” school. The preface tells the story of a woman interviewing with the admissions director at an exlusive school. At the end of the interview, the director discovers that the woman does not yet have a child. In fact, she’s not even preggers!
This story sound a bit urban mythy to me. I can’t imagine an admissions director not asking about the child first. Regardless, the point is well-made.
If you are considering applying your kids for private school, this book could be helpful. Just understanding the culture, if it’s not already on your radar, may help you negotiate the emotional minefields of rejection and acceptance. Or it could scare you into checking out your kids’ public education options more closely.
If you’re not having to deal with this craziness, count yourself lucky. I do.
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You didn’t ask a question, but I’m popping in anyway to say: after sweating admissions to a private school for my then-kindergartner, the school failed her miserably, serving not one of her needs. She was allowed to set her own curriculum (!) and she chose to play all day at the “family life” station, which included washing the plastic baby dolls all.day.long. No one questioned her “freedom of creative expression” and no one taught her how to write her own name, either.
Public school the next year, she repeated kindergarten, and has done well since then. I never looked back and, this year, placed my current kindergartner in the same public school as his sister.
The knife of idiocy can cut both ways, in either a private or public school setting.
a tough subject indeed…After all my years in Asheville saying we would not do a private school, I found we had to consider an independent school for the sake of Sonny Boy in a new town. The public middle school would have been a disaster (and is for many people). The weird thing is that the high school is top notch (and we’ll be there in a couple years).
I must say that the Quakers know how to do independent school. The kids couldn’t have a better education, on all the different levels I like. But I still feel the occasional stab of guilt over temporarily leaving the public schools and all they stand for.
Those of us in the homeschooling world read this stuff and breathe a sigh of relief. If we’re not pulling our hair out in utter frustration at the moment.
The role of public school is near and dear to my heart…seeing it’s decline and the subsequent flight to these private schools is heartbreaking. But in many cases, necessary. Very interesting post…and why doesn’t anyone ever send me free stuff?
Thanks for the comments, girls. How cool: comments from 1. one person who moved from private to public for her kids; 2. one who moved from public to private (at least for a short time); 3. and one who is homeschooling (i.e. kind of crazy).
I love the Internets!
Very interesting post.
I am 100 percent private schooled (K through college, baby), yet I’m pretty sure that both my kids will either attend public school. I live in a great area, why shouldn’t I partake? The Boy is currently in public preschool. If it were bad, though, and I wasn’t pleased with the private school options either, I also wouldn’t say no to homeschooling.
I think the underlying reason is that I am convinced that the key to any good education is parent participation.
And, maybe it’s just me, but I know enough crazy ass Ivy League degree toting psychopaths that I really don’t think it’s the ultimate thing in the world to get my kids into one of those schools.
I was 100% private schooled, and it is not even a question that my education was more well-rounded and challenging than my peers in the equivalent public schools in my hometown (Tampa, Florida). However, when Ariana was entering kindergarten, there was no way I could afford a private school for her. I had just moved out from hell (ex husband), and food was costly enough. Still, careful research of public schools in the area revealed to me a good choice for her elementary school, and I’ve been very pleased with it ever since. She’s in 3rd grade now, and her brother is in kindergarten there. Now I just have to consider what to do for 6th grade because none of the middle schools around here are decent in any way, shape, or form…
I think what I’ve learned over the years is that a private school can be good or bad…a public school can be good or bad…and homeschooling can be good or bad. It’s just up to us as parents to do the research to make sure it’s on the good side, no matter which of those three choices we make.